Saturday, May 4, 2013

"Does Size Matter?"

A strip club sued the City of San Antonio to try to enjoin a statute requiring exotic dancers to wear larger pieces of fabric.  A highly entertaining opinion denied the request for a preliminary injunction. 

Some of the best lines in the opinion:

Thus, the age old question before the Court, now with constitutional implications, is: Does size matter?

Plaintiffs clothe themselves in the First Amendment seeking to provide cover against another alleged naked grab of unconstitutional power.

The Court infers Plaintiffs fear enforcement of the ordinance would strip them of their profits, adversely impacting their bottom line.

While the Court has not received amicus curiae briefs, the Court has been blessed with volunteers known in South Texas as "curious amigos" to be inspectors general to perform on sight visits at the locations in question.

An Appendix is attached for those interested in a lengthy exposition, those who wish to appeal and those who suffer from insomnia.

To bare, or not to bare, that is the question.

Indeed, this case exposes the underbelly of America's Romanesque passion for entertainment, sex and money, sought to be covered with constitutional prophylaxis.

Should the parties choose to string this case out to trial on the merits, the Court encourages reasonable discovery intercourse as they navigate the peaks and valleys of litigation, perhaps to reach a happy ending.

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